“You have no idea what you’ve just started. Best of luck.” – Matthew Crouch, via matthew.crouchnasm@gmail.com.
I received his threat around midnight on Monday. He read my latest post about his attempt to bully me on my own blog. My voice has been heard, but I don’t think it’s been heard loudly enough.
Let me spell it out for him. I DO know what I’ve started.
I have unapologetically stood up against an abusive and threatening man who seeks to feed off of weakness to build himself up. I care about my own pride and self-respect as a human being, as a woman, and as a future soldier. If I let a lonely, insecure and drug dependent boy talk down to me, how could I ever be strong enough to protect my country and fight against actual enemies in close combat?
Owning up to my impulsive anger, I’m partially responsible for perpetuating this battle. But I’m not sorry for them, nor will I stop speaking up against a misogynist who thinks he has power over me, when he has no power over himself.
This hyper-masculine domination hits home. My aunt was overruled by a vicious monster for all of her life. He controlled her in so many belittling ways. She didn’t fight back, because she found no avenue or way out. As a result, she suffered emotionally, psychologically and physically.
I refuse to allow history to repeat.
Do you know the Soldier’s Creed, Matt? Look it up. Maybe you’ll learn something from it. By the way, have some respect for those who have served. They give their life for their country and swear to protect the innocent against villains such as yourself. Also, your messages will go to spam. If you ever try to threaten me, my friends or my family, you will be reported to law enforcement.
Was that loud enough for you?
Amanda Ridder 
He seriously just needs to get the point and move on already. It’s like he HAS to have the last word, typical abuser! I appreciate you sharing your story, Amanda. I once dated a guy that was emotionally abusive and ridding him from my life was the best decision I EVER made. You’re going to make an amazing soldier and I’m sure a great inspiration for others as well. Best of luck to you and hope you never have to hear from this dirt bag again!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Bailey!! I am so glad that you got away from that abuse. I have doubt that I haven’t seen / heard the last of egotistical monster, but one can only hope haha. Much love to you!
LikeLike
I’m sorry that you too have dealt with Matt. I feel sorry for any woman who has been in any sort of relationship with him. He dated the two of us at the same time because I was also the first girl he dated since his divorce. I wonder how many us are out there? Your stories of his behavior line up with the way I was treated. He is a very manipulative person who uses his past to gain sympathy and enjoys being in control. It’s sad, really. He’ll never know true happiness because he refuses to face his own demons head on. The best thing I did was realize he didn’t belong in my life. I refuse to give him any access. He doesn’t deserve it. I’m disappointed in myself for falling under his spell. I’m even more disappointed in him, he could be so much more if he just put down the ego and games.
LikeLike
Thank you for your input and concerns. I, too, apologize on behalf of his behavior for mistreating you in any way. Nobody, regardless of gender, age, ethnicity, should be taken advantage of the way he took advantage of us and others. Our kindness was truly taken for weakness. Now that I have come out of army basic training, I have a renewed sense of self-respect and level of integrity that I will fight to uphold throughout my personal life, and carry over into my relationships. I wish you the best and hope you surround yourself with the kind, loving people you deserve.
LikeLike